Let's put it into words.

What’s it really like to be your own boss? First, let’s examine the learning journey…

I’ve reported to both men and women. I’ve gone through performance reviews, I’ve written down tangible and measurable goals, I’ve achieved end-of-year bonus targets, and I’ve sometimes managed other people. All of this comes with being part of a team, of an organisation that’s greater than just one person. And all of it is probably necessary for a well-functioning team, to fulfill HR goals and tick legislation boxes.

My past bosses have exposed me to an array of different management styles. In my corporate career, I’ve tasted both the laissez-faire approach, the informal-but-firm leadership style, the military rule, and the kind-and-understanding mode. With this, my managers of days gone by all taught me something, and for that I’m grateful. Having tried my hand at management myself, I know that it’s a performing art, it’s a balancing act, and it’s definitely difficult. I have nothing but the greatest respect for leaders that motivate their team, lead by example and push and pull and demand until this large mass of humans are all moving towards the same goal.

What you see is what you get

As a freelance writer, I manage myself. Strangely, I tend to expect more from myself than from other people, and I also tend to be harder on myself than I am on others. This is an area to be aware of because when there’s no boss to say you’re done, go home, I need to take on that role myself.

The great benefit of managing myself though is that there’s no grey area: what you see is what you get. What you sell is what you deliver. I’m the administrator, the salesperson, the creative person and the editor, all rolled into one. I’m even my own assistant; a role I sometimes used to take back when I managed a large marketing budget and was at times inundated with calls from eager salespeople who wouldn’t take no for an answer.

The time it takes

Being your own boss saves time. There are no reviews, no management catchups to prepare for, no progress reports to fill out and no drawn-out weekly team meetings. It’s all in me, or in a spreadsheet that I write and update myself in no time. There are no colleagues to chat to at the water cooler, no work wives to better my day, no bosses down the hall to please. This is of course for better or for worse, but during Corona lockdown, I realised something about myself that I’ve forgotten. Tucked away deep inside myself during my decade-long international marketing career, I’m actually more of an introvert than I’ve made myself out to be. I don’t need social interaction just for the sake of them. I need other humans, yes, but the relations I crave are more of the intimate kind, the walk-for-an-hour-and-share-your-innermost-thoughts kind, and these kind of relationships are rare gems. I don’t expect to find them at a workplace (although I sometimes have, which has been an immense bonus). I like to get things done. I like to work on my own terms. I like to work in silence, crafting sentences, perfecting copy, imagining its effect on the recipient.

My own tune

Being your own boss doesn’t just mean dancing to your own tune; it means producing the music, too. It means building an environment that I thrive in at my kitchen table. It means making up the hours, the schedule, the balancing act and the work all by myself. Most days, it’s amazing. Other days, I might miss a certain colleague, but luckily – there are phones and Zoom dates for that. Once my cup is filled, I can go back to creating, eagerly watched by my mute companion: our tiny dog that somehow always manages to arrange his body so that I trip over him at least once a a day. Talking to an attentive dog while I’m filling my coffee mug is not to be underestimated because as a wise person once said, it’s not the act of talking itself that does the trick. It’s the listening that we crave.